So we’ve all been told having a goal is important right?
And I’m sure majority of you with have at least one goal …whether you’ve told anyone about it or if you’re actively working towards or not, we’ve all got things we’d like for our futures.
Yet, if we all have them – why are we not actively pursuing, and ultimately fulfilling them, more?
Is it because, over the years, we’ve built an unhealthy relationship with goals?
I’d guess most of us fall into two categories right?;
Maybe we’ve either learnt ‘what’s the point in setting goals; I never fulfill them anyway!’
Or we’re the opposite; we know we fulfil our goals – yet are coming to realise they never leave us fulfilled in the way we’d hoped.
If either of these are our relationships to goals, then maybe the ‘standard’ model of goal setting and delivery doesn’t serve us in the way we need.
Up until recently I fell into the second category; I knew I had good chance of fulfilling my goal, but to do so Id have to really push myself – put in ‘the grind’ and ‘force the result’ I was after. Only to then set the next goal before the dust had even settled on the previous one.
Because without a goal – how am I meant to keep myself motivated, right?
However over the last few years, I’ve started to learn a very simple yet significant shift in thinking about goals – but one which dramatically improves my relationship with both the journey and the outcome of any goal.
THE ‘GOAL’ IS NOT THE GOAL – THE ‘GOAL’ IS JUST THE TOOL.
So when I say ‘GOAL’ in this context – I’m referring to the specific tangible external output of my actions which I want to create.
But what I’ve learnt is to identify the REAL goal; the feeling/emotions/impact/outcome that I want to create by achieving said tangible external output.
Think about it – that moment when you come up with a new idea or goal – when it’s all exciting and inspiring – what different way of ‘being’ do you see yourself/your future as having? Is it not THIS which is our goal?
And what we automatically identified the tangible external goal, is actually the TOOL with which to enable us to come that way we want to ‘feel’ or to ‘be’ – as our method to get us to that feeling.
Yet all too often, we fail to identify the ‘feelings’ – the ‘why’ – behind any tangible goal we create for ourselves, and as a result, before too long, we’ve lost the ‘feeling’ goal, and are left with just the empty shell of the tangible goal/output.
At which point you probably either give up, or stubbornly progress but without any real reward at the end.
So the opportunity I present for you now is for a new way of considering and relating to your goals – by considering;
What change in you is your goal a tool for?
NOW you can focus on the positive change in you – which can happen the instant you choose it … you don’t have to delay it to some future date – and use your goal as a tool with which to reference whether you are being accountable to this change you want to see.
Give it a try – let me know how you get on 🙂